Sarah Gilbert Says Roseanne Ruined Her Life: “Nobody Will Hire Me”

Roseanne’s return to the spotlight has been a joy to watch. But few people are paying attention to the “woke” crowd left in her wake.

After a jury handed her control of “The Conners,” she tossed the show in the trash and used her newfound influence to make sure nobody would hire anyone who refused to back her.

Sarah Gilbert, who plays Darlene, was on the top of the list.

“I can’t believe she’s being so petty,” said Gilbert, “Nobody will hire me. All I did was call her a racist like everyone else. I mean, I also too her job, but that’s a different issue. She didn’t need it anymore.”

Gilbert has apparently been looking for a new gig for about two months to no avail. “She’s not exactly A’list,” said Kevin Sorbo, “she had a spot on Big Bang, the child actress thing on Roseanne, and like one other thing ever. Who will even remember her?”

“I always have to ask who she is,” said Gina Carano, “she’s got that familiar face. Like…’wasn’t she in that one show for a season?’ type looks.” Carano says she doubts someone with such a myopic life-view will ever be taken seriously.

Roseanne’s spokesman said she couldn’t care less if Darlene goes broke.

Related Posts

Video: The phone started to ring.

Video: The phone started to ring.

A married couple had just crawled into bed on night when the phone started to ring. The man got up to answer it, “How the hell should…

The tèènāge granddaughter

The tèènāge granddaughter

The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through top on. Her grandmother just has a fit, telling her not to dare go out like…

Bianca Stanciu: The Data Scientist Who Blends Tech, Fashion, and Digital Influence

Bianca Stanciu: The Data Scientist Who Blends Tech, Fashion, and Digital Influence

Bianca Stanciu is living proof that you don’t have to choose between science and style. Born on October 14, 1994, in Sunnyvale, California, she grew up in…

A hotel guest calls the front desk

A hotel guest calls the front desk

A hotel guest calls the front desk and the clerk answers, “May I help you sir? The man says, “Yes, I’m in room 858. You need to…

Jay owned a great big farm.

Jay owned a great big farm.

Jay owned a great big farm. He had lots of animals like pigs, chickens, horses, and cows. But then one day, one of his horses became constipated,…

Closing Sarmon Words

Closing Sarmon Words

A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it…