A 28-year-old guy sought counsel from the Reddit community after being forced to choose between his wife and his recently orphaned 11-year-old sister in an attempt to reach a peaceful conclusion.<\/p>\n
After two years of marriage, the guy had to painfully decide to break with his wife\u2019s plan for him and their childless existence in order to accommodate the small girl who wished to live with her older brother.<\/p>\n
However, his spouse wasn\u2019t having it.<\/p>\n
A 28-year-old guy revealed two years ago that he and his 28-year-old wife were having trouble with a choice that his orphaned 11-year-old sister had made.<\/p>\n
The message said, \u201cI want to adopt my sister after my dad\u2019s death, my wife refused because we agreed on no children. Is there a way to fix this?\u201d has been taken down from over its \u201ckarma limit,\u201d which typically indicates that the original poster (OP) set a limit on the number of comments to prevent excessive attention.<\/p>\n
Trauma<\/p>\n
A child may experience severe stress if their parent is unable to care for them. They will lose their dependable caregiver as well as the security they experienced in their former household.<\/p>\n
The OP felt compelled to look out for his sibling\u2019s welfare since he wanted to support her during this difficult time.<\/p>\n
Adding more detail, he writes, \u201c\u2026my sister has no parents now and I want to make sure she is able to recover and be healthy and since she wants to be with me, I will not force her to be with our uncle.\u201d<\/p>\n
Sadly, his wife did not agree, believing that adopting his sibling would not fit with the life she was creating.<\/p>\n
\u201cThis is causing a lot of tension with my wife, things escalated and finally told her I am doing this whether she agrees or not, she can either accept it or we get divorced.\u201d<\/p>\n
He writes, \u201cWe have not talked since then. What can I do in such situation?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah I feel like taking in your little sister is different than \u2018having kids after agreeing not to,\u2019 a Reddit member comments. \u201cThe poor thing! Does the wife have no heart?!\u2026She sounds selfish.\u201d<\/p>\n
A second shares, \u201cSeriously, choosing not to have children is one thing. Not taking in a beloved relative who happens to be a child in a time of crisis is a completely different situation!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe situation is very unfortunate but neither OP or his wife are in the wrong, OP is being a good brother by taking in his sister after her dad\u2019s death, but his wife has every right to want (want, not demand) the child free life they both agreed upon,\u201d writes a critic, whose comment invited scores of opinions from child-free advocates.<\/p>\n
\u201cAlways with the \u2018selfish.\u2019 I am child free by choice and have been told I am selfish for not having children so many times. What people fail to understand is that, for some of us, it is WAY better\u2026\u201d writes one.<\/p>\n
Another \u201cchild free by choice woman\u201d thoughtfully explains that she feels the OP should take in his sister, \u201cas long as you understand the consequences of that decision\u2026You and your wife are adults and should be able to amicably and rapidly divorce.\u201d Next, the user suggests the girl\u2019s guardian should have been established before their father\u2019s expected death. \u201cTruly, all of this should have been discussed and determined prior to your dad passing, and not during a weeping conversation with an 11-year-old girl, without speaking with your wife first. But, such is life. You\u2019ve let an 11-year-old decide and I think it would be absolutely terrible to say yes and then change to no.\u201d<\/p>\n
Not too long after, the initial poster\u2014who was by then a \u201csingle father-ish brother\u201d\u2014posted an update on the circumstances.<\/p>\n
\u201cI talked with my wife again. She still refused as she does not want kids. So we basically decided to go our separate ways.\u201d Disappointed over her husband\u2019s decision, the wife charged the OP with \u201cchoosing your sister over me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, my sister takes the priority now, I am choosing her over you. This was our last conversation.\u201d he adds, \u201cI have been living with my sister for 1 week now. Being a single father-ish brother is definitely challenging but I am really enjoying it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCongratulations for being the brother your sister needs, and commiserations for having to be the brother your sister needs,\u201d a netizen posts.<\/p>\n
One user intervened in the interim and stood up for his soon-to-be ex-wife.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t be so quick to slander the wife. They agreed no children and there was another option (Uncle). OP made a choice under extremely difficult circumstances and the wife chose to remain child free. No one should be attacked in this situation. Not all choices in life are easy, but this was still a choice.\u201d<\/p>\n
What would you do in a situation like this? Please let us know by SHARING this story so we can hear what others have to say!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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