{"id":23890,"date":"2026-08-12T23:57:39","date_gmt":"2026-08-12T23:57:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=23890"},"modified":"2026-08-12T23:57:39","modified_gmt":"2026-08-12T23:57:39","slug":"the-farmer-couldnt-figure-out-what-happened-next","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=23890","title":{"rendered":"The Farmer Couldn\u2019t Figure Out What Happened Next"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\nThe Farmer Couldn\u2019t Figure Out What Happened Next<\/p>\n

A young farm couple, Homer and Darlene, got married and just couldn\u2019t seem to get enough l0vin\u2019.<\/p>\n

In the morning, before Homer left the house for the fields, they m@de l0ve. When Homer came back from the fields, they m@de l0ve. And again at bedtime, they m@de l0ve.<\/p>\n

The problem was their nooner \u2014 it took Homer a half hour to travel home and another half hour to return to the fields and he just wasn\u2019t getting enough work done.<\/p>\n

Finally Homer asked the town doctor what to do. \u201cHomer,\u201d said the doctor, \u201cjust take your rifle out to the field with you and when you\u2019re in the mood, fire off a sh0t into the air. That will be Darlene\u2019s signal to come out to you. Then you won\u2019t lose any field time.\u201d<\/p>\n

They tried Doc\u2019s advice and it worked well for a while. But then Homer went back to the doctor\u2019s office.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong?\u201d asked the Doc. \u201cDidn\u2019t my idea work?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, it worked real well,\u201d said Homer. \u201cWhenever I was in the mood, I fired off a sh0t like you said and Darlene\u2019d come runnin\u2019. We\u2019d find a secluded place, m@ke l0ve, and then she\u2019d go back home again.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGood, Homer. So what\u2019s the problem?\u201d asked the Doc.<\/p>\n

\u201cI ain\u2019t seen her since hu-ntin\u2019 season started!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Farmer Couldn\u2019t Figure Out What Happened Next A young farm couple, Homer and Darlene, got married and just couldn\u2019t seem to get enough l0vin\u2019. In the… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":23891,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-23890","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23890","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=23890"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23890\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23892,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23890\/revisions\/23892"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/23891"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=23890"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=23890"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=23890"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}