{"id":24661,"date":"2026-10-14T19:32:52","date_gmt":"2026-10-14T19:32:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=24661"},"modified":"2026-10-14T19:32:52","modified_gmt":"2026-10-14T19:32:52","slug":"a-woman-was-in-bed-with-her-lover-when-she-heard-her-husband-opening-the-front-door","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=24661","title":{"rendered":"A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"
\nA woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.<\/p>\n

\u2018Hurry,\u2019 she said, \u2018stand in the corner.\u2019<\/p>\n

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.<\/p>\n

\u2018Don\u2019t move until I tell you,\u2019 she said. \u2018Pretend you\u2019re a statue.\u2019
\nWhat\u2019s this?\u2019 the husband inquired as he entered the room<\/p>\n

\u2018Oh, it\u2019s a statue,\u2019 she replied.<\/p>\n

\u2018The Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.\u2019<\/p>\n

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.<\/p>\n

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen, and returned with a sandwich and a beer.<\/p>\n

\u2018Here, have this\u2019 he gives the sandwich and beer to the statue.<\/p>\n

Then he said to the statue: \u2018I stood like that for two days at the Smiths\u2019 house and nobody offered me anything!!\u2019<\/p>\n

If you enjoyed this story, you should check out this one too, which I came across on another site a while ago.
\n\"\"
\nTwo blondes were taking their first train trip to Toronto on the train.<\/p>\n

A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas that they\u2019d never seen before.<\/p>\n

Each bought one.<\/p>\n

The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel.<\/p>\n

When the train emerged from the tunnel, she looked across at her friend and said, \u201cI wouldn\u2019t eat that if I were you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy not?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u2026<\/p>\n

..<\/p>\n

.<\/p>\n

\u201cI took one bite and went blind for half a minute.\u201d<\/p>\n

A man was Promoted to Montreal<\/p>\n

Boss: Congratulations! I\u2019m promoting you to manage our Montreal office!<\/p>\n

The young man (disappointed): But sir! There\u2019s nothing up there but bar girls and hockey players.
\nBoss (now insulted): I\u2019ll have you know that MY MOTHER is from Montreal!
\nThe young man (thinking fast): No kidding? What hockey team did she play on?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. \u2018Hurry,\u2019 she said, \u2018stand in the corner.\u2019 She rubbed baby… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":24662,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24661","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24661","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=24661"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24661\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24664,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24661\/revisions\/24664"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/24662"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=24661"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=24661"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=24661"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}