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\nA husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.<\/p>\n
\nA husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.<\/p>\n
That night, the wife approached her husband wearing the exact same s*xy negligee she had worn on their wedding night. She looked at her husband and said, \u201cHoney, do you remember this?\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked up at her and said, \u201cYes, dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married.\u201d<\/p>\n
She said, \u201cThat\u2019s right. Do you remember what you said to me that night?\u201d<\/p>\n
He nodded and said, \u201cYes, dear, I still remember.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, what was it?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n
He responded, \u201cAs I remember, I said, \u2018Oh baby, I\u2019m going to suck the life out of those big t*ts and scr*w your br*ins out.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n
She giggled and said, \u201cYes, honey, that\u2019s exactly what you said. So, now it\u2019s 50 years later, and I\u2019m in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?\u201d<\/p>\n
Again, he looked up at her, and he replied, \u201cMission accomplished.\u201d
\n
\nA husband and wife get up on Sunday morning.<\/p>\n
After breakfast, the wife notices that her husband isn\u2019t dressed for church.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy aren\u2019t you dressed for church?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSimple. I\u2019m not going.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy not?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, I\u2019ll give you three pretty good reasons why I\u2019m not going.<\/p>\n
First of all, the church is cold in the morning.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s just cold. Second, no one there likes me.<\/p>\n
Everyone is always talking about me behind my back.<\/p>\n
And third, most important of all, I just don\u2019t feel like going!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, I\u2019ll give you three pretty good reasons why you ARE going.<\/p>\n
First of all, the church isn\u2019t cold in the morning; it\u2019s warm.<\/p>\n
Second, I think, or I\u2019m pretty sure, that there are some people there who do like you, and third you\u2019re the minister, so get dressed.\u201d<\/p>\n
Read more\u2026<\/p>\n
A three-year-old boy little johnny went with his dad to see a litter of kittens.<\/p>\n
On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother,<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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