{"id":8264,"date":"2024-03-29T00:12:04","date_gmt":"2024-03-29T00:12:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=8264"},"modified":"2024-03-29T00:12:04","modified_gmt":"2024-03-29T00:12:04","slug":"bert-always-wanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/?p=8264","title":{"rendered":"Bert always wanted.."},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/IMG_9398-300x122.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"122\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-8265\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/IMG_9398-300x122.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/IMG_9398-768x313.jpeg 768w, https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/IMG_9398.jpeg 980w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home. Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, \u201cNotice anything different about me?\u201d Margaret looked him over.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNope Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots. Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, \u201cNotice anything different NOW?\u201d Margaret looked up and said in her best deadpan, \u201cBert, what\u2019s different? It\u2019s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it\u2019ll be hanging down again tomorrow. \u201dFurious, Bert yelled, \u201cAND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT\u2019S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?\u201d \u201cNope. Not a clue\u201d, she replied. IT\u2019S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT\u2019S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!\u201d Withoutmissing a beat Margaret replied, \u201cShoulda bought a hat, Bert. Shoulda bought a hat.\u201d share with friends and family!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home. Walking proudly, he sauntered into the&#8230; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8265,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8264","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8264","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8264"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8264\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8266,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8264\/revisions\/8266"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/8265"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8264"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8264"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ourtimenew.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8264"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}