John O’Reilly raised his beer at the pub and proudly declared, “Here’s to spending the rest of me life… between the legs of me wife!”

The pub erupted in laughter, and John took home the prize for the best toast of the night.

That evening, he strutted through the front door and told his wife, Mary, “Guess what, love? I won the prize for the best toast at the pub!”

“Oh, did ye now?” Mary said. “And what exactly was this fine toast of yours?”

Thinking quickly, John smiled and said, “Here’s to spending the rest of me life… sitting in church beside me wife.”

Mary beamed. “Ah, John, that’s a lovely sentiment!”

The next day, Mary bumped into one of John’s drinking buddies on the street corner. With a cheeky grin, the man said, “Mary, you should’ve heard John’s toast at the pub the other night—it was about you!”

“Aye, I know,” Mary said, “and I’ll admit, I was surprised. After all, he’s only been in there twice in the last four years—once when I dragged him by the ears, and the other time when he fell asleep!”