Little Johnny’s Answer
A nun was teaching Sunday school one morning when she asked her class, “When you die and go to Heaven, which part of your body goes first?”
Little Suzy eagerly raised her hand. “I think it’s your hands!”
The nun smiled. “And why do you think that, Suzy?”
Suzy replied, “Because when you pray, you hold your hands together, and God takes them first.”
“What a beautiful answer!” the nun said, nodding approvingly.
Then, of course, Little Johnny raised his hand. “Sister, I think it’s your legs.”
The nun frowned. “Now, Johnny, why would you think that?”
Johnny shrugged and said, “Well, I walked past Mommy and Daddy’s room last night, and Mommy had her legs straight up in the air yelling, ‘Oh God, I’m coming!’ If Dad hadn’t been holding her down, we’d have lost her for sure!”
In Nigeria, the 99-year-old Mother Superior lay quietly.
She was d*ing.
The Nuns had gathered around her bed, laying garlands around her and trying to make her last journey comfortable.
They wanted to give her warm milk to drink but she declined. One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen.
Then, remembering a bottle of Whiskey that had been received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.
Back at Mother Superior’s bed, they lifted her head gently and held the glass to her lips. The very frail Nun drank a little, then a
little more and before they knew it, she had finished the whole
glass down to the last drop.
As her eyes brightened, the nuns thought it would be a good opportunity to have one last talk with their spiritual leader.
“Mother,” the nuns asked earnestly, “Please give us some of your wisdom before you leave us”. She raised herself up very slowly in the bed on one elbow, looked at them and said:
“DON’T SELL THAT COW.”
When you die and go to Heaven…
A nun was teaching Sunday school one morning when she asked her class, “When you die and go to Heaven, which part of your body goes first?”
Little Suzy eagerly raised her hand. “I think it’s your hands!”
The nun smiled. “And why do you think that, Suzy?”
Suzy replied, “Because when you pray, you hold your hands together, and God takes them first.”
